After “failing” at the digital nomad lifestyle twice already, I decided to return to work as a cashier at my previous 9-5 job to save up some money and figure some things out before traveling and living abroad again.
The time I went back to work was during the height of the COVID-19 pandemic, so you can only imagine how “excited” I was to go back to work during that crazy time. Working 8-10 hours every day, standing in the same spot, and being able to take off my mask to breathe for 2 seconds in between customers was no fun at all.
I was thankful to be able to get my job back after leaving to go on this journey of living abroad but I was definitely not happy to be back. Having tons of knee pain, foot pain, and back pain from standing up all day in the same spot every day or for working in the aisles just wasn’t too exciting for me.
I constantly had to ask my manager for permission to go to the bathroom, take my lunch break, or step away from the front register for whatever reason which I am sure a lot of people can relate to.
I had worked here a total of 3 years on and off counting the times I had left to go abroad to Thailand and Bali. Things were crazier more than ever, as people were upset when we told them to keep their distance from other customers and we had a big glass in front of our register for safety between us and the customers.
Moving past that, the final straw that made me happily quit my job was the day my manager called me and a fellow employee into his office. We weren’t in any kind of trouble, but he just wanted to have a quick chat with us.
He told my co-worker and me that the COVID numbers in NY were very high and he let us know that a lot of people were unemployed and that we should feel very lucky to still have our jobs. Although I did not like his tone of voice, I did respect and agree with what he was saying, but I did not agree with what he had to say next.
The manager told us that since the COVID numbers were so high in New York, we would most likely get COVID and that when we did, the company was ready to replace us in a heartbeat. After that, we left the office, and my co-worker had for some reason recorded this conversation with our manager and reported him to the company for what he had said but nothing ever came out of it.
My heart dropped after that conversation, I was just filled with so much anger to hear this man’s way of thinking. After all, I was an essential worker at a pharmacy and while so many people decided to quit their job at my store during the pandemic, I had decided to stay there to serve my neighborhood and my bosses.
It hit me, at that moment, that I was just a slave at this job and that nobody really cared about me here.
I was just a number to them and was ready to be replaced at any moment, just like he said. This really opened up my eyes and I told my parents what my manager had said and what his attitude was towards me. Later that day, I called my manager and let him know that I would not be returning to work until I felt “safe” to come back.
After not saving as much as I wanted to, I was not sure if this was a good idea, but my mind would just not allow me to go back after seeing what my manager’s mindset was like.
He should have been grateful to have me working there but I could see that he was not.
Is this how all jobs see their employees? I think so.
Something built up inside of me that day, but it was a good thing. It was a realization that I would do everything I could to make something of myself and do a job I enjoyed doing. Such as freelance writing, running my YouTube channel, and just building up multiple income streams so that I would never have to return to a 9-5 job again.
Why work for someone that thinks so low of you just to get a complaint or a raise every few months or years? I do not need anyone to tell me that I am doing a good job, I can pat myself on the back. What is the good in breaking your back for someone else just for an extra dollar per hour?
I would rather use this time to better myself and to achieve something that I can be proud of. Something that truly makes me happy, something that I can build up.
This is what helped me to develop the mindset I now have today.
This also helped me to realize why I want to work for myself make myself proud, not caring who else is proud of me or who is ready to replace me.
